The List
by Jewelshoes
Summary: Before the Doctor dies there are some people he needs to see.
1. Rose

**So this came to me suddenly, it might be just a one shot but if people like it I'll create it into a series of different moments of the Doctor's farewell tour.**

The Doctor was on the way to his death. It was as if he was walking his final route to the guillotine. It was his farewell tour the only joy in a dying man pain. He had a list. Of course he had, who wouldn't? He took a short glance down at inked names of the people he loved. He smiled when he saw the next name on the list. It would be just another goodbye for them now, how many times had he seen her leave and when had it ever grown easier?

The Doctor danced around the magnificent Tardis wardrobe, spinning as he picked out a selection of appropriate clothing. Finally he was dressed and adjusted the bow tie for a final touch. Then he punched the ordinates into the Tardis and waited.

South London, SE15 if he remembered correctly, and he always did. The playgroup was situated in a church, using its hall from nine til three. He took a breath before swinging the door open.

"John Smith?" A harassed young woman dressed entirely in pink greeted him "Thanks so much for making it" She gripped his hand shaking it firmly "I'm Joyce, come in" Joyce ushered the Doctor into a brightly coloured hall that was packed with children creating havoc. "Just settle right in, the children are very accepting. Snack times at eleven, but before then just help the kids." Joyce sent the Doctor stumbling in the direction of a small table decorated with beads and plasticine.

"Hi" The Doctor waved gawkily at a gaggle of small children who had run over to meet him. There was no reply.

"Who are you?" A little girl stated pointedly after a long silence.

"I'm John, John Smith. Who are you?" The Doctor bent down to shake the girl's hand.

"I'm Britney. Why are you shaking my hand?" The little girl raised her eyebrows and caused the Doctor to quietly drop her hand.

"I'm Chloe" Another little girl piped up next to Britney.

"Hi Chloe" The Doctor smiled across at her, keeping his hands firmly to his sides.

"I'm 4 and a half. Aren't you going to shake _my_ hand?"

Obliged the Doctor shook her hand firmly, "4 and a half is very old" he nodded wisely to the delight to the girls. "And who are you?" He asked a small girl who was hidden behind Britney.

"I'm Rose." The little girl pouted

"Hi Rose" The Doctor's face broke into a huge genuine smile "Do you want me to shake your hand?"

"Yep please" Rose smiled shyly at the Doctor giving him her hand.

"And how old are you?" He asked still gripping her hand.

"I'm four and a bit." Rose beamed proudly up at him.

"I'm older." Britney nudged Rose out of the way. "_I'm _almost five. I'm going to big school soon."

"I'm going t…"

"You're too small for BIG school."

Rose gave a little yelp "Britney just hurt my toe…"

"I did not!"

"You did!" Rose looked at the Doctor reproached "She did." She whispered as if it was only for his ears.

He nodded comfortingly. "I know" he grinned at the girls, clapping his hands in the process "let's play a game!"

"What game?" Britney asked suspiciously.

"A very good game." The Doctor leaned towards the group as if telling a secret "It's called Run. It's a very special game. Someone is "it" and when they touch you have to stand _very _still and wait until someone comes and tags you and shouts RUN!"

"It sounds like stuck in the mud." Britney looked displeased.

"No. It's Run."

"It's stuck in the mud" he heard Britney whisper to the others and they nodded knowingly back.

"Who else wants to play?" The Doctor stood up expectantly calling children all around the room to him. Once he was hidden by a mass of children and explained he rules. "Right… One… two… three… RUN!" He yelled watching the children race around the room, and standing back content that having made up the game in a few seconds it was actually not that bad. Suddenly his calm aurora was broken by a tearful Rose running up to him. "Rose!" The Doctor bent down in panic "Are you ok?"

"I feel down." She whimpered gesturing down to a scarlet gash on her knee.

"Ouch" The Doctor told her simply, holding her hand and leading her towards the toilets. Placing her on the cabinet he gently washed her knee letting her childish tears wet the top of his head. "Hey, hey don't cry Rosie" He handed her a crumpled hankie "There you go, let's wipe those tears away."

"I want my mummy" Rose sniffed as the Doctor cleaned her eyes.

The Doctor stood back and stared concerned at the knee "Well, I think we might have to operate." He told her seriously

"Whaa?" Rose's eyes widened in panic.

"Or maybe we'll just use this" The Doctor grinned producing a small Barbie plaster from his endless pockets, and gentled pressed it down on Rose's knee.

"Kiss it better." She told him "Like mummy does."

Obligingly the Doctor bowed his head pressing his lips into the soft plastic. For a moment he just stayed there, letting her play daintily with his hair, and thinking. Suddenly the Doctor looked up and for a second Rose looked down and their eyes locked. She didn't understand, his eyes were like her grandpa's, lonely, old. "I want my mummy."

"Of course." The Doctor helped her down from the cabinet and through to the hall where Jackie was waiting.

"What happened to you?" Jackie shrieked in concern, bundling Rose into a coat and pulling her out of the door. Rose didn't even look back. But he looked on; as always the Doctor watched the ones he loved, alone. "Goodbye Rose Tyler." He murmured softly and forced himself to tear himself away. Then looked back down at the list and with a defiant stroke he crossed a line through her name. "Goodbye Rose." He watched a tear smudge the ink and create and blue river, linking all his friends together.


	2. Martha

**Considering the amount of follows this story has got I've taken that as confirmation I should carry it on…**

Letting the door swing gently on its hinges the Doctor hesitated before sticking his head out into the tangled forest. Heaving his body up he let the strong scent of a crisp autumn morning fill his lungs. As he shut the door, he gave the TARDIS a light pat and in return she gave him a soft hum of reassurance. Letting the scent of firewood and fallen leaves guide him to the beaten track, the Doctor for a moment, swaying in breeze and searching for a sign to tell him where to go. He needn't wait long for as he spun round, his boyish energy was halted by the site of Farringham through the trees. Its great features contrasted with the morning sunlight, turning the entire building into a sinister silhouette. The burning wood and calling of great bells filled his senses and he staggered forward.

Instead of the coarse tree bark the Doctor was expecting to feel next, he found himself in the arms on a lone figure. "Sir, are you ok?" the familiar voice of a nightingale caused the Doctor to peer upwards.

"Mar…miss!" the Doctor saved himself from a confusing "timey-wimey" explanation, and his worried features broke into a grin as he saw the familiar face.

"Are you ok?" Martha asked again and the Doctor nodded but as he tried to right himself he swayed in the wind, stumbling once again in to Martha's arms "it's ok, I've got you" she whispered, guiding his unsteady body through the woods. Once they reached a clearance in the trees she let the Doctor fall from her arms onto a soft pile of moss and fallen leaves. Then lowering herself down next to him she introduced herself "I'm Martha, I'm a doct…" She stopped herself just in time, she found it hard not to tell people her profession but a woman doctor in this era was positively alien. "… I can help, my… my… my friend's a doctor, I know things…"

"I'm John, John Sm…" The Doctor broke off as he saw a quizzical look form on Martha's face "John Noble" He recovered with a grin "I'm fine, just had a slight shock that's all, I used to go Farringham." He explained to her "I came back for a visit, to see old friends, make amends…"

"Make amends?" Martha asked sensitively.

"Just someone who I didn't treat right at the time; they were a very good friend." He stared lost at trees for moment before Martha's shallow breathing next to him reminded him of her presence "Anyway" he asked changing tack "why are you here?"

"I'm working. For the moment." She sighed dishearten "Working at Farringham."

"You don't like it?"

She furrowed her brow unsure of what to say, to disagree or agree and risk losing her job "No… no I don't." She told him finally.

"Is it just you? Are you alone or?"

"Yes… no… yes… I used to travel with this friend; this amazing friend. But, well it's complicated and now we're stuck here and it's supposed to be temporary but I think he's forgotten me."

"I'm sure he hasn't." The Doctor comforted her, wrapping his arms away her to shield her from the morning breeze. For some reason it didn't feel strange when he did this. It felt ok, normal, like she knew him… and she didn't.

"Oh but he has" Martha laughed a small harsh laugh "he's even… he's even… well he's even fallen in love." She sighed longingly "I mean I'm only his friend, a hitchhiker practically... He had this… companion a while back, this friend… compared to her I'm nothing. And I thought I was finally gaining his admiration, I thought finally he was actually seeing me. And now, now this. Now I'm nothing more than his servant, I'm his bloody servant and he's my everything. My everything. But he never even notices me…" By the end of this rant Martha was wrapped comfortingly in the Doctor's arms and he felt nothing but shame. He'd love her, he still did, but it always only as a friend, and although he knew she would grow to accept this and love him this way instead, he would always feel guilty about his treatment of her for those first few months.

"I'm he doesn't." He told her stroking her hair methodically "You sound very brave and this man, well he must have been mad not to treat you better."

"He didn't mean it…" Martha told him half-heartedly defensively "He was mourning, still is I suppose. I think he just needs someone with him… I don't think he understands what he's done."

"He must mean an awful lot to you if you forgive him that easily."

"He does" Martha nodded "he's the most important man in the universe." With last triumphant sentence that she untangled herself out from the Doctor's embrace "I think I need to be going, they're ever so strict if you're late… I hope you find your friend" She smiled embracing him one last time.

Then when she was almost out of the clearing she swore she heard him say "You were brilliant Martha Jones. Just brilliant."

"_Thank you_" She smiled exhilarated and the Doctor watched her walk, with a bounce in her step, through the woods with pride. It was only once she was on the lane that Martha realised she hadn't him her second name and by that time he was gone.

**Reviews make my world go round **


	3. Donna

**Thanks for the reviews everyone **

He wanted a banana. Today felt like a banana day. This is why the Doctor, list folded neatly in this breast pocket - kept safe for the future, was walking through Sainsburys. Sometimes he felt like being his old self, or selves, any one of them, and today was one of those days. He browsed the aisles searching for his requirement, side tracked by silver ball bearings, stacks of Galaxy bars – the only food Martha would eat after a stressful day, fish fingers and custard, separate of course, and Jammy Dodgers – which he'd only discovered when Donna demanded them to dip into her tea. He was bending down to collect a packet when he collided.

"Oi watch it!" Meekly the Doctor looked round to face an angry red head staring down.

"Donna!" He spluttered too quickly, regretting his word as he spoke it.

"Do I know you?" Donna shot him a confused glare, snatching the packet of biscuits out of the Doctors grasp.

"- No…" The Doctor paused considering a suitable excuse. "You're mother knows my mother. I've heard her talking about you, seen the pictures."

"Not at all stalkerish then."

"No" The Doctor shook this head with a sheepish grin and Donna's glare relaxed into a smile.

"Sorry about this" She gestured to the packet dangling from her fingertips. "Urgently needed – it was Norris you see. I told her not to eat them all, but what does she do? Eats every last one of them – greedy cow! And now you see Tescos had run out, and Asda's a while away, so I just have to these. Sorry." She apologised as she noticed the empty box sitting at her feet. "Look you can have one if you want. It's just I really need them. Mum's been on and on and on at me, and then there's this deadline and it's just been one of those weeks!"

The Doctor nodded. It had been one of those weeks for him, but maybe not in the same way it had been for Donna. "Its fine keep them, sounds like you need them."

Donna nodded enthusiastically. "Thanks, I owe you one. Here" They were outside the shop now and Donna ripped open the packet. "Take it." She placed a small round biscuit in the Doctor's palm.

"Thanks, thanks for everything." He shot her a smile, resisting the urge to stuff it in his mouth.

"See you around then?"

He murmured a reply, watching her walk away. He felt the urge to run after her, throw his arms round her and shout "look it's me! Spaceboy! The Doctor! Your best mate!" But he couldn't it would be selfish. So instead he watched, watched with admiring silence. That was Donna Noble. That was one of his best friends, and she didn't even know who he was.

He wanted to go and see her, again. He knew he was selfish but he couldn't stop this urge, this over whelming urge to go and see Donna. He wanted to go, he wanted to so badly. And with Jammy Dodger still in hand he opened the TARDIS, and span round the controls in excitement, he was going to see Donna again, he was going to see his Donna again.

-x-

"Mr Smith?" Sylvia peered through the doorway suspiciously in a way that even now gave the Doctor the shivers; he never did seem to click with peoples mothers.

"Call me Johnny" He told her with a mouth full of biscuit with a shoving one hand at her to shake and using the other one to precariously hold a collection of magicians' equipment.

"You're late." She stated ignoring his hand and leading him into the house.

"Am I? Oh sorry about that, things to do, people to see!"

"The thing you were supposed to be doing is entertaining my daughter and her friends, and the people you were supposed to be seeing is a bunch of over excited seven year olds." She informed him rather pointedly.

"Give it rest Sylvia love! At least he's here now!" Sylvia opened the lounge door to reveal the voices owner, Wilfred who was down on his knees and looking like he was having as much fun as the children he was amusing. "Anyway I think granddads been doing quite a good job hasn't he?" He asked, and was met with the delighted screams of fifteen seven years olds agreeing with him. "But I think its Mr Smith's turn to take over now." He told them gesturing the Doctor forward.

"Call me Johnny" He said with a smile and asked, whilst he knew full well the answer "which one of you is the lucky lady?"

"ME!" A young Donna leapt up enthusiastically "I'm Donna, and this is _my _party."

"Really? Well are we sitting comfortably?" "YES!" Came the energetic reply "…Then I'll begin…" With that the Doctor brought out his want with a flourish and began enhancing the children with a selection of simple but equally fascinating tricks.

An hour in and Sylvia appeared ushering the children into the kitchen with the promises of cake and food.

"Can you teach me a trick, please?" Donna asked appearing in front of the Doctor as suddenly as the other children had disappeared.

"A magician never reveals his secrets." He told her with a wink, lowering himself to Donna's level.

"…But it's my birthday!" She told him with a childish whine "…_please! _Just one?"

"Well, ok, as it's your seventh birthday – which, no one tells you this, but it is one of the most important of your birthdays." He told her with a knowing nod which she mimicked gravely "So what do you want to know birthday queen?"

"Can you teach me how to become invisible?"

"Invisible?" He asked seriously

"Yes. Invisible."

"Why would you, Donna Noble want to be invisible?"

"Because…" She started but he wouldn't let her finish.

"But why be invisible when you can be brilliant?"

"Can you make me brilliant then?" She asked innocently.

"Donna Noble… I can't make you brilliant, because that's what you are, Brilliant with a capital B. You just don't it yet. One day you'll be one of the most brilliant people I'll have ever known, that anyone will have ever known…" The last few sentences of his small speech were lost in transition by the noise of numerous children surging into the living room on hunt for the birthday girl.

He didn't speak to Donna alone again, but when he eventually left, his last sight of her was Donna Noble, his Donna, sitting in prime position at the table with a massive smile on her face and Happy Birthday being sung round the room, and that was enough. To see her happy one last time was enough.

**Please pressed that button and review this – I'll give you a slice of Tardis cake, can you really resist that? **


End file.
